wait & see

let's just see how it goes, shall we?

2010 might be very interesting...

happy new year! to the handful of people still reading this space. :)

christmas eve

this is, i believe, the nicest christmas i've ever had in my life so far. :)

despite fighting a sore throat, trying not to succumb to fever, and worrying about a certain someone who suddenly went on radio silence for two days, i am most blessed this christmas than any other before. i have a sister, ten thousand miles away, and i know she loves me.

:)

scarred

so i have a scar the size of a caesarean section.

i also have a mental scar slightly larger than the above.

two scars, months apart, from different sources, for different reasons.

one physical, one mental.

one from a surgeon, one from a loved one.

thankfully, the cause of the latter did not result in another physical scar of the year.

are there any more, 2009?

on the table again

the operation table, that is.

this time is a tad scarier than the last.

15 may 2009.

wow

i never knew you were such a superficial person. really, all that matters is just the facade, isn't it? i'm a little disappointed in you, i must say. even though i'm not part of the picture, nor do i want to be anymore. you asked for advice, and i gave it. i gave it objectively.

and i meant it when i wished you all the best.

meh

i don't need a man who behaves like my boyfriend only when no one else is around.

tofu

once again, i have to remind myself that i am not made of tofu.

ahem

*waves at the two people who are still checking this space everyday*

:D

panic

she is dead. just like that. from the time she'd found out till the last breath she'd taken, was only a span of three months.

three short months.

i have been a silly girl. i cannot be skipping my follow-ups. i cannot convince myself that i am fine. i cannot run away anymore.

*slaps self*

come on. pick your guts off the floor. you're not made of tofu.

...

she was so beautiful. i didn't know her well, but she was so beautiful.

perhaps

i am a little warped.